Hello.
I'm writing here... to clear my mind of a bunch of things. As I've been agreeing with a good friend of mine... life really does just get more complicated as you grow up. No one child would want to grow up, if they understood of the complications that we'd have to face once we did.
I guess that's just what makes the journey of life so interesting... or maybe it's what makes it so confusing. Either way... this is what it is.
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Sunday, April 26, 2009
All we need is a Dream
*sigh* I'm back. Once again, to bore you with the novelties of my life. It's actually quite interesting... I have an odd life. No one can say the same things went through their mind as they did mine. No one can say that the same thing happened to them, as it happened to me. Even if the circumstance is the exact same one, my reactions and my thoughts changed the entire situation. Fun, eh?
I don't know where to start from. I want to write down everything that's happened... but, blah. So much has been going on... and yet nothing has. I wish there was a way to save my thoughts. Just like you do with a computer... just email the conversation between you and your thoughts to yourself. That would be great... it would make my 'reviewing' life much easier.
I had a birthday a couple weeks ago (the 15th). It was a lot of fun. On my actual birth'date' I woke up in a really good mood, and felt very helpful. So I spent that morning helping random people out 0.0. It was great.
The Friday following that date was the day selected for my birthday party. It was a really great turn-out. I'd say probably around 100 people showed up... some stayed the entire time, others just stopped by for an hour or so and then left. But overall it was a really great time.
There was also another thing that happened at that party... but I don't feel like just writing it down here in a blog for the world to see... it's much too precious for that. If you'd like to know, send me a message and perhaps I'll tell ya all about it.
Another thing that happened for my birthday, was that I got pranked. It was brilliant. Y'see... I have a Honda trail 90 motorcycle, and it's MY motorcycle. I love that thing. Anyways, what happened was I went to the movies with a couple of friends, and brought the motorcycle along. I parked it outside of the movie theater (at the same place I always do) and went in. As we were going into the movie we stumbled into Benno, Arno and Victor... three other friends of mine who were going to a movie also (a different one than us, though). To get to the chase, I came out of the movie theater and my motorcycle wasn't there. I began to panic... and ran towards the road to look and see if there was anything that caught my eye to lead me towards a clue. But there was nothing. Just at the point that I felt I was about to lose it and start running around like a chicken with my head cut off... I see Benno come up towards me with a camera... Yeah. I got pranked. They had hid it in the actual parking lot behind the theater. It was great... Benno earned a slap right across the face from me... and yet I was grinning the entire time. I wasn't mad, but one of my friends that came with me was... Man, she was really really mad. It was hilarious. My relief was too great to be mad. Plus Karma got them right aftewards... the Police came up and asked them what they were doing with the Cameras and what not... apparently the Drug store right in front of the Movie theater thought we were going to rob the place... pff... it was great.
Well, there's more that I have to say... but I'm running out of time.
'Till next time!
-Lily.
"You know how there are some songs that just don't make the same impact if you can't hear them loud and strong, feeling the bass in your chest and singing without listening to your own voice?"
- Rodrigo Schwartz, incredible writer and friend.
I don't know where to start from. I want to write down everything that's happened... but, blah. So much has been going on... and yet nothing has. I wish there was a way to save my thoughts. Just like you do with a computer... just email the conversation between you and your thoughts to yourself. That would be great... it would make my 'reviewing' life much easier.
I had a birthday a couple weeks ago (the 15th). It was a lot of fun. On my actual birth'date' I woke up in a really good mood, and felt very helpful. So I spent that morning helping random people out 0.0. It was great.
The Friday following that date was the day selected for my birthday party. It was a really great turn-out. I'd say probably around 100 people showed up... some stayed the entire time, others just stopped by for an hour or so and then left. But overall it was a really great time.
There was also another thing that happened at that party... but I don't feel like just writing it down here in a blog for the world to see... it's much too precious for that. If you'd like to know, send me a message and perhaps I'll tell ya all about it.
Another thing that happened for my birthday, was that I got pranked. It was brilliant. Y'see... I have a Honda trail 90 motorcycle, and it's MY motorcycle. I love that thing. Anyways, what happened was I went to the movies with a couple of friends, and brought the motorcycle along. I parked it outside of the movie theater (at the same place I always do) and went in. As we were going into the movie we stumbled into Benno, Arno and Victor... three other friends of mine who were going to a movie also (a different one than us, though). To get to the chase, I came out of the movie theater and my motorcycle wasn't there. I began to panic... and ran towards the road to look and see if there was anything that caught my eye to lead me towards a clue. But there was nothing. Just at the point that I felt I was about to lose it and start running around like a chicken with my head cut off... I see Benno come up towards me with a camera... Yeah. I got pranked. They had hid it in the actual parking lot behind the theater. It was great... Benno earned a slap right across the face from me... and yet I was grinning the entire time. I wasn't mad, but one of my friends that came with me was... Man, she was really really mad. It was hilarious. My relief was too great to be mad. Plus Karma got them right aftewards... the Police came up and asked them what they were doing with the Cameras and what not... apparently the Drug store right in front of the Movie theater thought we were going to rob the place... pff... it was great.
Well, there's more that I have to say... but I'm running out of time.
'Till next time!
-Lily.
"You know how there are some songs that just don't make the same impact if you can't hear them loud and strong, feeling the bass in your chest and singing without listening to your own voice?"
- Rodrigo Schwartz, incredible writer and friend.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Where does the good go
Well... I'm going to try for the millionth time to do this. I really have tried (perhaps not a million times), but for some reason what I want to say is very hard to get into words.
A lot has happened, suffice it to say. My past couple weeks have been filled with schoolwork, friends, and buying male thongs. I recently won 2nd place in a 'dibujo a lapiz' contest (sketch/pencil drawing). That was really nice, it made me feel happy... considering, 1- I was NOT in the mood for drawing, 2- I haven't drawn anything in a long time, and, 3- I was completely and utterly unprepared. Therefor, it felt good.A quick side note: I have not had caffeine for 2 months :D! WOOT! Current observations are that my shakes have indeed become much more subtle, but have not cleared away entirally. Also my sleeping habits are incredible, I'm actually able to go to sleep before midnight, and get up at the usual time. I'm probably quite a bit healthier now... which is, of course, a plus. It's amazing what certain (however mild) drugs can cause such disastrous affects on your body... well, perhaps not disastrous. But the small changes I've noticed so far are a huge difference.
Well let's see... what else is interesting... I learned how to play chess in one night :P. One of my friends (and now neighbor) plays chess, quite well- might I add. He came over today and taught me... I never knew you could learn how to play chess in one night, heh. Wow, he knows how to play the piano. I'm incredibly jealous. He's no professional, but he is indeed good.
On Saturday was Benno's birthday party. He invited quite a few people over to Victors house for a party and sleepover... but it only ended up being Benno, Arno, Victor, Myself and Denae. Zahra and Arif also showed up but not until later that day. And Zahra didn't stay the night... therefor it was myself and Denae, sleeping over at a boys house with 4 other guys. It was an awesome night. Denae and I both got him a gift together, it was absolutely genius: First, it was just normal hygiene stuff (everything any 18 year old guy would like to get), such as soap, deodorant, toothbrush/toothpaste, razors, mouthwash, etc. Then, we got him a bike horn (since he loves his bike so much... hehe). It was one of those really old looking horns with the huge thing you squeeze and then it makes noise... lol. Pardon my terrible description.
The next 3 gifts that we got him were just... genius. We got him a playboy magazine, a male thong and a tampon (that had "Just in case" written on it"). You have no idea how much fun it was shopping for his gifts. And his expression as he opened everything up was absolutely priceless.
After Zahra left, and we all had changed into comfortable clothes, we sat down in Victors room on the floor and just started talking. Bear in mind, the people there at that time were: Benno, Victor, Arif, Denae and I. Arno went to walk Zahra home, and came back in about half an hour. So... picture a sleepover with 4 guys and two girls... what's bound to happen? Well, it did: "Spin the bottle, Truth or dare." Man... it was scary. And it just figured that I had to open the game (Victor literally grabbed a spray deodorant thing and put it in the middle of the group) by asking Benno something. My question (best question ever) was "Have you ever had a peanut-butter and pickle sandwich?". I suppose you could probably guess the answer.
So the night went on like that... until around 2 a.m. or so. Yes, just to satisfy your curiousity... I was asked dry about my crush on Benno, and yes I was dared (quite a few times) to kiss him. No. I didn't, of course. But it was tempting. At times I wonder if I'll regret not doing it, but I don't think so. I'd hate (obviously) to kiss someone I like on a dare.
I realized that night how much I really do like Benno though. It sucks. It sucks tremendously.
A lot was confessed that night. I am amazed at how truthful we all were, you'd think that if you don't want to answer a question with the truth... you'd just lie. But I'm pretty sure that we all answered with complete honesty. How scary is that? The amount of information those boys know about me is quite terrifying. Same with what I know about them. We have MAJOR blackmail.
Well, I suppose this is the highlights of what has been going on in my life. A lot more has happened, of course. But none if it is as interesting as this is.
Tootles,
-Lily.
P.S. For that one person, I'm sure you know who you are. I hadn't planned on just writing down everything going on in my life here, I would have preferred telling you myself. But that hasn't worked out according to plan lately. So here it is, weeks worth of information in one blog. Perhaps we can catch up on more fairly soon.
Well let's see... what else is interesting... I learned how to play chess in one night :P. One of my friends (and now neighbor) plays chess, quite well- might I add. He came over today and taught me... I never knew you could learn how to play chess in one night, heh. Wow, he knows how to play the piano. I'm incredibly jealous. He's no professional, but he is indeed good.
On Saturday was Benno's birthday party. He invited quite a few people over to Victors house for a party and sleepover... but it only ended up being Benno, Arno, Victor, Myself and Denae. Zahra and Arif also showed up but not until later that day. And Zahra didn't stay the night... therefor it was myself and Denae, sleeping over at a boys house with 4 other guys. It was an awesome night. Denae and I both got him a gift together, it was absolutely genius: First, it was just normal hygiene stuff (everything any 18 year old guy would like to get), such as soap, deodorant, toothbrush/toothpaste, razors, mouthwash, etc. Then, we got him a bike horn (since he loves his bike so much... hehe). It was one of those really old looking horns with the huge thing you squeeze and then it makes noise... lol. Pardon my terrible description.
The next 3 gifts that we got him were just... genius. We got him a playboy magazine, a male thong and a tampon (that had "Just in case" written on it"). You have no idea how much fun it was shopping for his gifts. And his expression as he opened everything up was absolutely priceless.
After Zahra left, and we all had changed into comfortable clothes, we sat down in Victors room on the floor and just started talking. Bear in mind, the people there at that time were: Benno, Victor, Arif, Denae and I. Arno went to walk Zahra home, and came back in about half an hour. So... picture a sleepover with 4 guys and two girls... what's bound to happen? Well, it did: "Spin the bottle, Truth or dare." Man... it was scary. And it just figured that I had to open the game (Victor literally grabbed a spray deodorant thing and put it in the middle of the group) by asking Benno something. My question (best question ever) was "Have you ever had a peanut-butter and pickle sandwich?". I suppose you could probably guess the answer.
So the night went on like that... until around 2 a.m. or so. Yes, just to satisfy your curiousity... I was asked dry about my crush on Benno, and yes I was dared (quite a few times) to kiss him. No. I didn't, of course. But it was tempting. At times I wonder if I'll regret not doing it, but I don't think so. I'd hate (obviously) to kiss someone I like on a dare.
I realized that night how much I really do like Benno though. It sucks. It sucks tremendously.
A lot was confessed that night. I am amazed at how truthful we all were, you'd think that if you don't want to answer a question with the truth... you'd just lie. But I'm pretty sure that we all answered with complete honesty. How scary is that? The amount of information those boys know about me is quite terrifying. Same with what I know about them. We have MAJOR blackmail.
Well, I suppose this is the highlights of what has been going on in my life. A lot more has happened, of course. But none if it is as interesting as this is.
Tootles,
-Lily.
P.S. For that one person, I'm sure you know who you are. I hadn't planned on just writing down everything going on in my life here, I would have preferred telling you myself. But that hasn't worked out according to plan lately. So here it is, weeks worth of information in one blog. Perhaps we can catch up on more fairly soon.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Day Late Friend
Well... here I am again. And I'm afraid this time I won't be telling you about anything nearly as optimistic as a carnival night.
My best friend moved. She... left me. Well, I shouldn't say it like that, it sounds much uglier than it really is. She just had to go to college. There wasn't any way around it. And this is life. I'm perfectly aware of it, and I know that it happens everywhere and to almost everyone. But that doesn't make me feel any better about it. She was just... my best friend. She knew me better than I knew myself sometimes. I could always go to her, no matter what. I knew that somehow, she'd help me through whatever was going on. She'd always be at my side. And now... even though I still know she is, it's just not the same. I'm going to miss her so much. It still hasn't really hit me that she's gone. But I can guarantee you that when it does... it's going to hurt.
There's so much more I want to write. But at the moment, the words are simply falling out of my grasp. I can't think of how to continue this note, so I guess I'll just stop here.
I'll climb my way out of this hole somehow. I always do.
-Simply, me.
My best friend moved. She... left me. Well, I shouldn't say it like that, it sounds much uglier than it really is. She just had to go to college. There wasn't any way around it. And this is life. I'm perfectly aware of it, and I know that it happens everywhere and to almost everyone. But that doesn't make me feel any better about it. She was just... my best friend. She knew me better than I knew myself sometimes. I could always go to her, no matter what. I knew that somehow, she'd help me through whatever was going on. She'd always be at my side. And now... even though I still know she is, it's just not the same. I'm going to miss her so much. It still hasn't really hit me that she's gone. But I can guarantee you that when it does... it's going to hurt.
There's so much more I want to write. But at the moment, the words are simply falling out of my grasp. I can't think of how to continue this note, so I guess I'll just stop here.
I'll climb my way out of this hole somehow. I always do.
-Simply, me.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Butterflies and Hurricanes
So... yesterday was the carnival. I had a great time. I went there with my sister around 8 30 and met up with some friends around 9ish. This year, the rides were great. There was one called "The Evolution", it was really awesome. Victor, Arno and I all got on it. Because of the fact the ride carries you upside down and goes around in circles... all the blood rushes to your head. When we got off, poor Victors head was like a tomato... the poor guy. His eyes were bloodshot! Hah. As for myself... I got off laughing hysterically. It was fun.
Sadly, that was the only ride we got on that night... well, the only "big" ride. There were 2 or 3 other ones that I wanted to try... but perhaps next time. Ahh! There was also paint balling :D:D:D. We didn't do it though... OH MY GOODNESS! The creepiest thing happened that night too: My sister and I were just walking around the carnival waiting for the rest of the group to arrive, when we decided to just go watch the people that were paint balling. So we go over (keep in mind, the location of the carnival was a park) and just stand in a dark, secluded area surrounded by trees, when a really tall, young guy walks past us and says "Hola Lili". Man, he freaked me out. I have no idea how he knew who I was... I mean, unless he had seen me in the light or something... Plus, I haven't seen that guy for 3 years! (He was a classmate in 6th grade, his name is Hugo... yes, I knew who he was but I just can't get over the fact he knew who I was) It was really really interesting... Man... Haha. Great night.
Let's see... the people who showed up that night were myself (obviously), my sister (obviously), Arif, Victor, Benno, Arno and Zahra (Arno's girlfriend). Also, Denae and Meagan had shown up, we bumped in to them a couple times... but they were off on their own.
One thing I noticed that night, that I'm not sure what to take from it, was that I was getting a lot of... odd attention from Benno (he's the guy that had previously told me that although he liked me, but he didn't want to be in a relationship right now because of time... or something like that). Just quick glances, small smiles, brief physical contact... such as him pulling me towards him with his hand on my shoulder and whatnot... It's just a bit confusing. But all right, it's better than the alternative... haha. Course then again, I suppose it's really not that odd... we've always been like that. The physical contact especially has always been a bit interesting between us. Just everything that's been going on with the two of us... makes me wonder.
Everyone started leaving around 11:45 or so, because Arif was going to give the group that showed up a ride to their house... so that kinda just left my sister and I there until my Mom decided to show up... so we walked around some more, we talked about random stuff... played a couple games. Then we decided we were hungry so we walked around the million food stands and decided to get Chinese food (at a Mexican carnival... haha). It was actually probably the best Chinese food I've had in a long time. Well, about this time it was probably 12:30, and we were getting really tired and just ready to go home. So, we called my mom about a dozen times (She was with my dad at a gig... so it was loud and she couldn't hear the cell), and then waited for another 15 minutes for her to get us.
We got home around 1ish... and although I was so tired I practically was falling asleep in the car, I still got on the computer *shakes head*. I'm really addicted to this thing. One day, when I have nothing 'of importance' to do on the computer, I'm going to ground myself for a month. This'll probably have to be once we move into town though... or else I'd die. But yeah, I'm going to ground myself and see if I survive happily. lol... I actually did that once... ground myself, I mean. It was only for a day though.
Well, now it's Saturday... 11:12 on a Saturday. It's a wonderful day out... and OH JEEZ! I'm going to be at rehearsal for a play I'm in from 12:30 p.m. to 10:30 p.m.!!! AAAAGGHHH!!! What the HECK am I supposed to do for TEN FREAKIN' HOURS at a THEATER!??? Oh well. I'll live. lol.
Tootles!
-Lily.
P.S. The reason I wrote my name "Lili" when describing what happened with that one guy was because in Mexico, that's the way they spell my name. And there actually IS a big pronounciation difference... It just makes it all more realistic. Hehe.
Sadly, that was the only ride we got on that night... well, the only "big" ride. There were 2 or 3 other ones that I wanted to try... but perhaps next time. Ahh! There was also paint balling :D:D:D. We didn't do it though... OH MY GOODNESS! The creepiest thing happened that night too: My sister and I were just walking around the carnival waiting for the rest of the group to arrive, when we decided to just go watch the people that were paint balling. So we go over (keep in mind, the location of the carnival was a park) and just stand in a dark, secluded area surrounded by trees, when a really tall, young guy walks past us and says "Hola Lili". Man, he freaked me out. I have no idea how he knew who I was... I mean, unless he had seen me in the light or something... Plus, I haven't seen that guy for 3 years! (He was a classmate in 6th grade, his name is Hugo... yes, I knew who he was but I just can't get over the fact he knew who I was) It was really really interesting... Man... Haha. Great night.
Let's see... the people who showed up that night were myself (obviously), my sister (obviously), Arif, Victor, Benno, Arno and Zahra (Arno's girlfriend). Also, Denae and Meagan had shown up, we bumped in to them a couple times... but they were off on their own.
One thing I noticed that night, that I'm not sure what to take from it, was that I was getting a lot of... odd attention from Benno (he's the guy that had previously told me that although he liked me, but he didn't want to be in a relationship right now because of time... or something like that). Just quick glances, small smiles, brief physical contact... such as him pulling me towards him with his hand on my shoulder and whatnot... It's just a bit confusing. But all right, it's better than the alternative... haha. Course then again, I suppose it's really not that odd... we've always been like that. The physical contact especially has always been a bit interesting between us. Just everything that's been going on with the two of us... makes me wonder.
Everyone started leaving around 11:45 or so, because Arif was going to give the group that showed up a ride to their house... so that kinda just left my sister and I there until my Mom decided to show up... so we walked around some more, we talked about random stuff... played a couple games. Then we decided we were hungry so we walked around the million food stands and decided to get Chinese food (at a Mexican carnival... haha). It was actually probably the best Chinese food I've had in a long time. Well, about this time it was probably 12:30, and we were getting really tired and just ready to go home. So, we called my mom about a dozen times (She was with my dad at a gig... so it was loud and she couldn't hear the cell), and then waited for another 15 minutes for her to get us.
We got home around 1ish... and although I was so tired I practically was falling asleep in the car, I still got on the computer *shakes head*. I'm really addicted to this thing. One day, when I have nothing 'of importance' to do on the computer, I'm going to ground myself for a month. This'll probably have to be once we move into town though... or else I'd die. But yeah, I'm going to ground myself and see if I survive happily. lol... I actually did that once... ground myself, I mean. It was only for a day though.
Well, now it's Saturday... 11:12 on a Saturday. It's a wonderful day out... and OH JEEZ! I'm going to be at rehearsal for a play I'm in from 12:30 p.m. to 10:30 p.m.!!! AAAAGGHHH!!! What the HECK am I supposed to do for TEN FREAKIN' HOURS at a THEATER!??? Oh well. I'll live. lol.
Tootles!
-Lily.
P.S. The reason I wrote my name "Lili" when describing what happened with that one guy was because in Mexico, that's the way they spell my name. And there actually IS a big pronounciation difference... It just makes it all more realistic. Hehe.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Yellow Submarine
Sometimes I wonder if there's something wrong with me. More than usual, that is. I mean... shouldn't I feel hurt? Shouldn't I be sad, or let down? And yet... here I am, perfectly fine. I don't feel hurt, I'm not sad, I'm not even depressed or any of the sort! I can actually say I'm happy. I'm good... it just doesn't make sense.
Picture this: You have a crush on someone. It's a guy/girl that you've known for at least 3 years, and never even thought about liking them as more than just a friend. But you see them one day, and for some reason... it's different. They seem to shine more, their smile is captivating... beautiful. That person just is so much... better, and you don't know why. So you begin to want to be with them more, you start spending more time with them... and you realize that you have feelings for that person. Now, all of this happened in about 3 weeks. And at the end of those three weeks, the person you realize you like, comes up to you and tells you that they just can't be in a relationship right now.
Wouldn't you be hurt? Wouldn't you feel like you held your hopes up and just watched them crash? Yeah... That's what I thought.
Man... I'm so weird. I just don't know why I don't feel that way. I mean, the most I can say that I feel is dissapointment. That's it! And I saw him today and aside from his robotic hug (which I'm chastizing him for), it was completely normal. We're still good friends. But... gah! I almost feel like I should have more emotion in me.
But ahh well. That's just who I am I suppose. I've never really been hurt that way. Is it because I don't allow myself to get hurt? Do I somehow block my emotions? Or... did I even feel the way I thought I did for that person?
*shakes head and sighs* Another thing to add to the "101 Things Wacked with Lily". But hey, that's who I am... and honestly, I'd much rather it stay this way. I've gotten used to myself... hehe.
Ttyl!
-Lily.
Picture this: You have a crush on someone. It's a guy/girl that you've known for at least 3 years, and never even thought about liking them as more than just a friend. But you see them one day, and for some reason... it's different. They seem to shine more, their smile is captivating... beautiful. That person just is so much... better, and you don't know why. So you begin to want to be with them more, you start spending more time with them... and you realize that you have feelings for that person. Now, all of this happened in about 3 weeks. And at the end of those three weeks, the person you realize you like, comes up to you and tells you that they just can't be in a relationship right now.
Wouldn't you be hurt? Wouldn't you feel like you held your hopes up and just watched them crash? Yeah... That's what I thought.
Man... I'm so weird. I just don't know why I don't feel that way. I mean, the most I can say that I feel is dissapointment. That's it! And I saw him today and aside from his robotic hug (which I'm chastizing him for), it was completely normal. We're still good friends. But... gah! I almost feel like I should have more emotion in me.
But ahh well. That's just who I am I suppose. I've never really been hurt that way. Is it because I don't allow myself to get hurt? Do I somehow block my emotions? Or... did I even feel the way I thought I did for that person?
*shakes head and sighs* Another thing to add to the "101 Things Wacked with Lily". But hey, that's who I am... and honestly, I'd much rather it stay this way. I've gotten used to myself... hehe.
Ttyl!
-Lily.
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